People who accuse me of speaking in riddles will of course use the above words as a case in point. Allow me to explain, eventually.

 

Back at the gym, I'm happy to be able to say, I recently spotted a mother and daughter panting away after a round of sit-ups, chatting with the daughter's friend about their progress. They were all sweaty and cracking a few jokes – a very simple but special mother-daughter moment. That moment was a fine example of something simple yet illusive that I still dream about experiencing. If I might divulge a bit more, I have a relationship with my parents – I’ve rarely done anything with one that hasn't included the other. So there's a part of me that wishes that things were different, and there’s the wiser part of me that acknowledges what I would like to happen, but reminds me that things are as they are and as they should be. I've learned to stop comparing what other people have with I have. While it's healthy to acknowledge and appreciate what other people have, it's another thing to covet something that is not yours by design. Still, I allowed myself to indulge vicariously in this mother-daughter moment, and rather than harbour a misplaced resentment, I was able to understand my attachment to and fascination with what I saw. And then I was able to quickly and humbly return to the reality of my quivering flesh, heaving its way onward. You go girl!

 

This of course is but a simple example of what I'm trying to get at, and it's a topic that's been on my mind for some time – how things that don’t happen can take more precedence in our minds than events that actually did happen or have the possibility of happening. I know, this is sounding like me again, but I've met many people whose lives took a turn for the worse because of a dream they had that didn't come true. Whether a job or a relationship, the lack of its appearance along someone's pathway of destiny can send a strong negative message to the emotions, and in particular the ego. It's hard not to equate a lack of something with failure and/or rejection. But let us not overlook what is positive and possible too readily. The important point is to be flexible about what can bring us happiness, because, as hard as it is to admit as a human being, we often don't have a clue about the bigger picture and how all these clunky misshapen pieces fit together and make any sense, let alone hit the happy button. I truly believe in the proverb that the more you learn the less you know. And, I know, there I go sounding like me again; if not reassuring, at least predictable.

 

But what's the alternative - to run away and hide because life hasn’t followed a preconceived plan? Why not practice giving things up, letting them go, and see what life has to offer in return? I'm practicing this a bit myself, and it's nowhere near as easy to do as it is to write about. And, it also brings up many questions about whatever it is that you are holding onto.

 

I really think life is too big of a mystery to pretend to understand it all and it doesn't hurt to play the detective once in a while and test a theory or two. I'm testing one right now as I write, and I'll let you know what I find out!